Skip to product information
Congrats, You're Barely Functioning-Printable Digital Roast Card
$3.00
For the friend or co-worker whose body clock is broken, immune system retired, and attitude running solely on sarcasm.
Send this card when:
☕ They’ve been sick for 3+ months
🦠 Their immune system waved the white flag
😷 You want to say “get well” without the Hallmark lie
🧃 They need fluids, naps, and a personality transplant
WHAT YOU GET
✔️ Printable 7x5 PDF (front + inside included) along with link to Flip Book for this Card
✔️ Instant digital download — no waiting, no shipping, no excuses
✔️ Clean design — no watermarks on your file, just savage Halloween shade
⚡ Note: Previews are watermarked for protection. Your download will be crisp, print-ready, and hauntingly funny.
Print it. Frame it. Send it with a 💋